A Cure for wrinkles! No Botox!

This weekend I found the cure to those nasty little wrinkle lines that form between the eyes. And guess what? It doesn’t cost a thing! And only requires a one-time treatment. Sound too good to be true?
It’s not.

First, it requires a man (DOESN’T IT ALWAYS?)
But not just any man, a big strong guy who can lift a bicycle and hang it from the rafters in the garage a mere couple feet from where you would normally carry laundry to and from the dryer.

Next, said guy needs to remove all soft parts from the bike, such as rubber wheels, so that the only bike parts that hang down are carbon-fiber (one of the strongest metal known to mankind) eye-pokers.

With me so far?

Then, said strongman needs to say in an off-handed way, “Watch out for my bike. I'm working on it.”

Now, it is laundry time. It is best to wait until the bins are overflowing with dirty clothes. This way the piles in your arms can be so high that you can barely see where you are going.

Also, I would suggest doing the laundry at the end of the day after the sun has gone down so that the garage is semi-lit, at best. Being extra tired helps in this situation as well, that way you don’t remember any off-handed warnings.

Are you ready? This is where it gets good.

Here we go…bend over, load up your arms with dry clothes, than stand up and walk at a fast pace straight into the eye-pokers. Be careful to hit them as hard as possible and right between your eyes. There! Perfect.

Of course, this is the part where you might say some things you don’t want the kids and/or neighbors to hear you scream. But you might not be able to help it because you are completely out of your senses from the pain.

As you teeter along, seeing stars in that dimly lit room, you try not to drop the huge batch of clean clothes on the floor where the dog vomited only hours earlier. Still grumbling those words that you hardly ever say, checking for blood, you grab an ice pack, hobble nearly blind to the couch and call it a day.

But wait!

There’s more. Call it the Ginzu Knives set.

Your strong guy, great big beautiful lug that he is, will undoubtedly say something like, “What happened? Did you hit my bike? Told you to be careful.” Which will make your blood pressure rise higher allowing more of it to go directly to your throbbing forehead.

And voila! You no longer have wrinkles between your eyes.
Of course there’s a lump, maybe a horn.
But isn’t that a small price to pay for beauty?

No worries, I’ll be fine.

My Everyday Heroes

Today I am talking about some of my favorite people in the world.

These are people who inspire me, warm my heart, and make life exciting.
Come on over to Beyond the Veil

I might just be talking about YOU!

Most likely, I am.

Happy Monday!

Today I am blogging about some of my friends over at Beyond the Veil, the Blog for Samhain Authors.

Beyond the Veil

http://paranormalauthors.blogspot.com

Go take a look.
I might be talking about you! Most likely, I am :)

The question is: who are your heroes and why?

Leave a comment there or here.

Happy Lazy Mom Day

I heard on the radio this morning that it is National Lazy Mother's Day.

Can I tell you how excited I am?

After making the lunches, the breakfasts, taking the kid's to school, feeding and caring for the dog and getting paperwork together, I had all sorts of things planned for today--five loads of laundry, clothes and stuff to put away, spray everything down with Lysol (kid and hubby are sick), scrub the toilets, pay the bills, work, write, edit...

But now I am going to sit for a little bit and read. Ahhh.

Okay, I'm going to do the other stuff too, but for a moment, I'm going to be a lazy mom. I hope you will too.

Love the day!

Where in the World Am I?

Today I am the interviewed author over at Make-Believe Mondays:
http://makebelievemondays.blogspot.com/

I'm also blogging at Beyond the Veil:
http://paranormalauthors.blogspot.com/

And for the rest of the week I will be in Orlando Florida at the Romance Writers of America Conference.

Shew. Some week and it's only Monday!

Hugs,
Kimberley

Catch Me in Bookstores

Today's the day!
Catch Me in Castile hits the stores today. Hopefully, one near you.

Now for the book tour.

I will be physically and virtually at the following places:

June 5th, The Book Loft, 1680 Mission Street, Solvang, CA 2:00 - 4:00 (Come! I'll have cupcakes provided by Cupcakes for Cancer)

Blogging:
June 4th RomCon (Big deal in the romance community) www.romconinc.com
June 4th Nikki Duncan nikkiduncan.com/blog
June 26 Samhain Publishing weblog (my publisher)www.samhainpublishing.com/blog

Article: Seattle Examiner

Author interview:
June 7th Ann Lory Blog Bites www.annlory.blogspot.com
June 8 Savvy Readers www.savvyreaders.com
Romance Divas Member News Month of June www.romancedivas.com
Raven blog www.ravenhappyhour.com/ravenblog/

Reviews:
Gothic Journal Recommended Read

"...will take you on a journey across the world and into the belly of an engrossing suspense..." Night Owl Romance.

"...fine mix of paranormal and mystery..."
Romantic Times

“…made me feel like I was being swept away to Spain, and I must admit, she also made me wish I had a Santiago waiting for me at journey's end…”
Joyfully Reviewed

So You Think You Can Write A Book?

Hi gang,

I am blogging over at Beyond the Veil on Monday, April 5th. http://paranormalauthors.blogspot.com/

If you have ever thought about writing a book, you might want to stop by.

Until then, have a wonderful Easter.
Enjoy your family and friends.
And be good.

Kimberley